RSS

Tag Archives: time with God

Healthy Boundaries: Loving People With “No”

HEALTHY BOUNDARIES- Loving People With %22No%22 Recently, I’ve found myself saying “no” more frequently. Admittedly, when we go through difficult seasons, we definitely draw more inward and limit our interactions and involvement. That’s a normal response when we need more mental and emotional energy to process the harder parts of life.

Even so, I’m becoming more comfortable with “no” and finding it to be another way to love people. For one, it’s being honest about ourselves instead of making false promises. Good intentions are a beautiful thing, but when we regularly can’t carry them through, we become people who disappoint.

In child-raising or managing employees, “no” can be a friendly word that clearly delineates where the guardrails and boundaries are before they are accidentally (or intentionally) crossed. Children tend to feel secure when they know expectations; this is also true in the workplace.

So why are relationships so difficult?

Why do we struggle at times to place down a healthy “no” in our closer relationships?

Is it because: Read the rest of this entry »

4 Comments

Posted by Bonnie Lyn Smith on May 31, 2016 in Drawing Healthy Boundaries, Ministry Moments, Relationship with God

Tags: alone with God, boundaries, desolate places, drawing boundaries, healthy boundaries, healthy relating, healthy relationships, Jesus Christ, Lazarus, let the children come, loving with no, luke 5:16, matthew 10:11, pray, relationship with God, saying no, shake off the dust, time with God

Parenting in a Coffee Shop [Excerpt from “Not Just on Sundays”]

03 Sep

Espressos of Faith offers another excerpt (below) of Not Just on Sundays: Seeking God’s Purpose in Each New Day. One section of the book focuses on coffeehouse stories where life slows down to observation mode, and much can be reflected upon in both the quietness of being still and the white noise hum of sitting in a public space. A great amount of parenting is also done there—both my parenting of my own children and my listening to the Father parent me. Pull up a chair with me for a minute, and imagine (or remember) these moments with your own children. Take a minute to find some rest in your day. Thanks for joining me!

—————————-

I enjoy being in a coffee shop for various reasons: to write, read, observe people, talk to a friend, treat someone to a pumpkin latte, etc. Of course, I can come up with almost any excuse to sit in one for a few hours. Really, just smelling the coffee alone calls me in like a beacon. I feel like I’ve finally made it to the mother ship when I smell fresh beans grinding or brewing. But some of my very best parenting moments also happen there. When a child has a particular issue to talk out, we can focus on each other better, away from home, in a different setting. If one of them has a challenging project, I will take that child for a muffin or decaf iced latte to help him or her focus and break down the task into smaller pieces. Several years ago, I took Chickie to a local coffeehouse to plan out her report on fairy tales. On other occasions, we have come just to de-stress and play some Skip-Bo®. During those times, the kids tend to share more of their lives with us.

Read the rest of this entry »